Travis Logie managed to get a semi. Perhaps not the kind of semi he was hoping for in his last event before retiring from competitive surfing, but a semi nonetheless. It may well even be a full-on boner. Travis obviously hasn’t consulted Surf Europe’s Guide To Penis And Testicle Care, featuring essential advice on how to hide your stiffy when you’re wearing boardshorts.

Yes, it was Logie’s final Pipe Masters. Besides an erection he was also nursing an injury that had already ruled him out of Round 1, and he limped down the beach in evident discomfort for his Round 2 match-up. He battled on valiantly, insisting on surfing his heat regardless, but unfortunately he was unable to progress through to Round 3. It is hard to surf with a collateral ligament tear in your knee and an erection.

Jordy Smith had been hoping to chairlift his good mate Trav up the beach, but Jordy had had a nasty encounter with the Backdoor reef in his own Round 2 heat, and was getting fixed up in a nearby hospital at the time. The honour fell instead to Mick Fanning and Aritz Aranburu. It was a fine moment and a fitting tribute to his nine-year career on tour. Bye bru.

Here’s the wave that put fellow bru Jordy out of action.