Noel Gallagher: “Surfers Are Arseholes”

“Do you not think all surfers, by very definition, are arseholes?” asks Noel Gallagher.

You’re familiar with Noel, no doubt. From britpop giants Oasis? Not the licensed buffoon with mediocre voice and inflated ego who once rang room service at his hotel and tried to order a trampoline, claiming simply, “I like to bounce”; but the wittier, slightly less buffoonish one with mediocre voice and inflated ego who used to be good at writing stirring albeit crudely derivative pop songs, and is now just good at giving amusingly provocative interviews. Yeah, him!

“Surfing’s for idiots,” he recently told Fuel TV, in response to a question that involved the admittedly asinine phrase “action sports”. But surfers aren’t quite as bad as skateboarders, apparently. Skateboarding is for “fookin’ little idiots”. Motocross on the other hand is fookin’ sound.

“Skateboarders can quite frankly go and fuck themselves. As can surfers. Do you not think all surfers, by very definition, are arseholes?”

Such a cheeky chap, that Noel. And does the video not make you chuckle? Or does it maybe make you reach for your pitchfork? Or do you find yourself half nodding in agreement, thinking, “maybe we are arseholes, inherently, unavoidably, by very definition”?


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