It was real nice here today. Boiling hot, offshore this morning (albeit near gale force) and pretty pumpos. I watched three dudes get bazzed on three waves in a row this morning, it looked real pretty.

For whatever reason, I just couldn’t be arsed. There are loads of Wasques here for the Braderie (a sale of surf gear in Soorts) and it was pretty crowded, so I just didnt bother. I did some things in the garden instead.

I bought some bags of horse shit from Leclerc, and double dug the western bed. The bees were roaring in the cherry blossom, providing a beautiful bass hook carried across the yard in the stiff offshore. My mum gave me some early peas and early runner bean seeds last time I saw her and I needed to get them in coz I’m going to Madeira next week and didnt want to miss this phase of the moon for planting. The moon phase is pretty important to the vitality of your greens, see. I opened the windows and put Ror ror’s speakers outside, so I had some tunes to get busy to. Plants love music too. I played John Lennon’s Jealous Guy several times. Peas and Beans are well into that one. It is a classic after all.

So I’ve been chatting with a German chick on facebook, Tanja. Actually she’s half German, half Filipino, which if you ask me is a pretty good combo; it’s exotic, but it’s also punctual. She seems pretty funny, in a good way I mean. I checked out her pics and she looks pretty hot too (although, profile pics can be pretty misleading, let’s not read too much into that). So I instantly figured something’s not quite right here, seeing as a) she’s a bird, and b) she’s German and c) cute, how can she be funny?

Then it hit me. Oh no, not again. It’s… a ladyboy. How can I have been so stupid? Especially after last time. I got off pretty lightly on that occasional really, luckily for me his parents decided not to press charges. Actually he got a pretty good deal out of it too, or at least his school did. They’re the only elementary school in Bangkok to have signed, leatherbound volumes of my poetry and a free Surf Europe subscription in the library.


Newsletter Terms & Conditions

Please enter your email so we can keep you updated with news, features and the latest offers. If you are not interested you can unsubscribe at any time. We will never sell your data and you'll only get messages from us and our partners whose products and services we think you'll enjoy.

Read our full Privacy Policy as well as Terms & Conditions.