Revealed | 22-year-old British Surfer Who Saved The World (From Cyber Attack)

Marcus Hutchins could well be the famous UK surfer since Wham's Andrew Ridgeley

The small matter of the world’s biggest ever malware attack was taking down the NHS, and threatening oh so much more last Sunday, making headline rolling news.

It all seemed a bit, well bleak really.

But then a young Newquay-based surfer, who like all good heroes wished to keep his real identity hidden, and be known only as @MalwareTech, stepped da fuck in.

“I was out having lunch with a friend and got back about 3pm and saw an influx of news articles about the NHS and various UK organisations being hit,” he told The Guardian, preferred paper/website of the Right on Leftier Than Thou Social Sharer. “I had a bit of a look into it and then I found a sample of the malware behind it, and saw that it was connecting out to a specific domain, which was not registered. So I picked it up not knowing what it did at the time.”

In short, he basically saved the world, saved the NHS (like Corbyn would definitely do… but alas mightn’t get the chance, coz of The Sun) and saved loads of people loads of money.

But what did the media say? How did they report it?

Stab ran a pic of oli Adams surfing in Scotland, but other than that played it pretty much with a straight bat.

Beachgrit’s Charlie Smith, on the other hand, took the opportunity to have yet another pop at the English surfer.

“Have you always chuckled at the British surfer too? Asked Chas. ‘Do you picture him, with reddish hair and pale skin, floundering on an egg-shaped surfboard in the windswept Corn Wall? His face ruddy from the ice-cold water and bangers and mash? His wax and even shade of brown from the countryside’s loamy soil?
Do you you picture him like Dusty Payne without skill?
Well then you too are in for a big surprise. The world owes its peace, this morning, to a fine British surfer!

Sure the stuff about the egg, the wind, floundering, bangers and mash etc etc is fair game. But Dusty Payne? That’s taking it a bit far.

The ever-professional CarveMag added a bit of insight, and speculated on what that pre-world saving lunch might’ve been, saying:

“The only details you need for now is that he (hero @MalWare Tech) loves surfing, pizza (media making massive deal about this so I dare say he’s got a free table for life at Pizza Express? Huh?) and judging by his tweets he’s pretty funny.
For those surfers GCSEs etc it’s also interesting to note he is also self taught “I’m not a graduate,” he told one reporter. “I had planned to go to university but ended up getting offered a job in security a year prior, so I took it. I’m completely self-taught so in hindsight university would probably not have been worth the time or money.”

The Sun on the other hand, on something of a charm offensive having recently tried to take on Surf Europe and losing, just ran a pic and named him, 22-year old Marcus Hutchins.

He reportedly stopped the cyber evil with an £8.29 domain, which is pretty much the best value for money ever, since Surf Europe legendary 2005 Product Guide, which was essentially 132 pages of ads and pictures of stuff to buy (i.e. ads), for a mere £3.50.

Surfing is in a really good place right now.


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