You can imagine the phone call, can’t you?

“Honey, you remember how you said to be careful with Rufus in the sea? How I must remember to make him wear his armbands? And how I mustn’t let go of him no matter what happens? Well I figured he’d manage without armbands, I mean he’s 9 months old now — at least he was, poor thing. Turns out he can’t swim so well. Everything was going so well until we got swallowed up by the foam ball. He was slippery as a fish, I just couldn’t keep hold of him. I’m sorry, I really am…”