The whole pre cum stage had us so excited. Since then it’s all been a bit stop-start. Pipe has teased us mercilessly; there have been flashes of thigh, cuddles in the kitchen to get things off the ground, a bit of a feel here and there, but it’s not been letting round the bases.

The forecast looks promising for a Thursday afternoon restart Hawaiian time, but while you’re waiting why not take a look through the Surf Europe wank bank of the best moments and biggest talking points at the Pipe Masters so far. A preparatory bash is always advisable, just to steady the nerves.