Just in: Good news for Australians, who are still writhing in the misery of a worm cut in half with a spade, after being smashed, a-gain, by the fucken Poms at the Rio Olympics.

The national mood Down Under, which is surely now becoming begrudgingly accustomed to sporting humiliation (like for example, finishing lower on the medals table than the county of Yorkshire) may now be somewhat lifted by plans unveiled for a Wavegarden!

This time, the part of Australia begging for a piece Euro wave generating technology is Perth, WA, whom many people believe to be Australia’s worst city. Like these folk, on the ‘I Hate Perth, WA’ Facebook page.

“After living in Perth for four years I can say I am an expert in shit. I fucking hate the place and would very much like the four years of my life back.” – Aaron Kent

“Perth has taken my health, my job, my money and my what little is left of my self worth.” – Bev Thomas

“Perth really really sucks. Cant stand it here. The dumb fucks cant drive, talk or spell.” – Belinda Hames

Well, Aaron, Bev and Belinda, cheer up!

Urbnsurf plans to be open in 2018 (two blessed years before the next annihilation by the Pommy carnts in Toyko) and will only be 9km from the Perth CBD. (CBD is Australian for ‘city centre’, btw)

If, as reported, Australia is to have upwards of ten Wavegardens by 2020, it’ll have more Wavegardens than Olympic champions.

Chin up!

(Learn more about Australia here. And more specifically, Western Australia, here!)