SELF-CONFESSED PRO GROUPIE DISMAYED AT WIVES AND GIRLFRIENDS NOW ON TOUR
"I have even had to have sex with a surfer who wasn't even ranked in the top 100 on the WQS. It's degrading."
A self-confessed professional surfer groupie or "pro ho" has expressed her disappointment at the number of wives and girlfriends that seem to be traveling with their partner on the ASP world tour. "Its fucking ridiculous," said Sandy Piper, 26, from her home on the Gold Coast. "Everywhere you look, the top guys are traveling with model girlfriends, or wives, or even worse, their bloody kids."
Piper remembered what she calls the good old days, when the pro tour was rightly debauched and a moral free zone. "There was a time when I could suck a guy's dick, and I'm talking top 20 in the world here, when he still had his contest singlet on! If they had girlfriends, and to be honest who cared if they did, at least they had the good sense to leave them at home," Piper said sadly.
Piper says its no wonder that young girls at events are forced to write "headjobs for free and "finger me please" on their backs and bottoms at events , such is the slim pickings.
"I think the ASP should do something about it, maybe even ban partners at events, or at the very least, from attending afterparties," continued Piper. "I've been forced to go after drunk 17 year old pros who haven't even won a pro junior. I have even had to have sex with a surfer who wasn't even ranked in the top 100 on the WQS. It's degrading."
Piper is still deciding whether to follow the tour in 2014. The ASP declined to comment.